Sunday, December 30, 2012

Back here again.

Well I was so disappointed with myself for being here yet again. I promise myself this time every year that I'm going to work hard and make changes to Lose weight and be the person I know deep down under all that fat, I am. Every summer holidays I feel like shit when I'm on the beach next to all those beautiful people. I look terrible in a swimsuit and just feel frumpy. To make matters worse I'm the heaviest I have EVER been in my entire life. Even at the last stages of my pregnancies.
Well that has pushed me. I am 80kilos. I am unhappy and miserable, unmotivated and down. It effects my relationship with my hubby as I don't want to be intimate as I feel so unattractive.
I took the first step and ordered lite and easy. I know it's a fair amount of money but if I can get used to eating correct portions and can lose some weight I will feel more motivated as it comes off and then I can learn healthy recipes for all of us to eat. I know I don't want to be here again it is lousy.
I added photos of me and the first one is of who I can, will and deserve to feel like.